Thanks, Internet!

Here are just a few of the things that I had to restrain myself from shouting in the middle of my bizarre goal-setting meeting earlier this week. Not sure which would have been worse in the long run.

Punch in your weightclass, you backwards ass mountain man.

Ka-boom! Here we come! Whose woman parts are next?

Duodecimal duodecimal duodecimal. (Repeat endlessly.)

Academia is not well-suited to management-speak. The gaily coloured form, with its columns for "Goals!" and "Action Items!" and "How will you know when you have made tangible progress towards your Goal?" ended up full of things like "Broaden area of knowledge", "Read things", and "Talk to collaborator". My subconscious sprang into action with rapid-fire edited highlights of all the euphonious phrases I've read during the past few days' idle blog inspection, and I began to chew on the sides of my tongue while making a "thinking" face.